Not Just Tighty Whities
by dietpunkfics
Summary: By accident, Tony discovers a secret Gibbs has been hiding for years. Slashy goodness!


He'd just gotten out of the shower when he realized that he didn't have a single pair of clean boxers. Amazing how several dead petty officers and/or Marines tended to get in the way of doing laundry... Digging through his partner's drawer, he managed to snag a pair of the soft knit boxers he loved... As he grabbed them, his hand caught a soft cord. Frowning, he grabbed it, only to find a soft flannel Crown Royal bag. Carrying it over to the bed, he spilled the contents onto the comforter... Upon seeing what was inside, Tony DiNozzo couldn't help but grin maniacally. This was going to be good.

It'd been less than 10 minutes after he heard the water stop running when he heard quick footsteps rushing closer and closer. Having another sip of bourbon, he went back to working on the boat, figuring Tony would be downstairs shortly so they could finally order dinner and enjoy a well deserved night off... After a week of utter hell, Jethro was looking forward to having a nice calm evening with his lover.

"Oh, Jeth~~~ro!" Internally, Gibbs winced. Anytime Tony used that singsong tone, he knew he was doomed - regardless of the way, shape, or form. Looking up from the plank he was sanding, he saw the manic grin on his partner's face as he came down the basement stairs. Yup. Definitely screwed.

Tony pulled the bag out from behind his back, and Gibbs winced. He'd known knew it was a bad idea to hang onto those damn things.

"See, I'm trying to figure something out here, babe. Why the HELL does my tough as nails Marine boyfriend have a collection of novelty thongs? I mean, really Jeth... I can understand the camo one, but the rest?" Smirking, Tony opened the bag as Jethro felt his face grow hot. Holding up the first pair, Tony continued, "Um... You do realize that hung like an elephant is just a phrase, right? I mean, c'mon, babe... We both know you've got a nice dick, but this is just insane." With that, he shot the elephant thong at his lover. "And this... " He held up a pair that had devil horns at the waistband, and eyes just above the crotch... "This is just taking horny to a new level." Groaning, Gibbs looked around, trying to find an escape from this personal hell he seemed to be stuck in. When Tony pulled out the next pair, he groaned. "Babe, this is NOT what I meant when I said I want to see you in a tux! Although, the tails on your ass would be a nice sight... Still, that doesn't count as getting dressed up. And this!" He held up a mini kilt... "Let me guess. Ducky?" By this point Gibbs was reaching for more bourbon, but his lover didn't get the hint and decided to continue. "But you know what, Jethro? This is my personal favorite. Don't get me wrong, the assless underwear are great, and you can bet you'll be wearing them sometime soon, but this..." He held up the thong with a rooster on the front. "This happens to be my absolute favorite. You want to make fun of my leopard bikinis? Well, at least I don't have a thong WITH A DAMN COCK ON THE FRONT! And don't even start with the rest of them... Speaking of leopard, you're one to talk!" With that he held up a leopard print thong.

Jethro was glaring at him by this point - an effect that was lessened by the crimson red shade his face was.

"Tone, I can explain."

Smirking, Tony grabbed the coffee mug full of bourbon and leaned against the work bench, clearly waiting. He resisted every snarky instinct he could even possibly possess as he replied, "I can't wait to hear this one."

Looking around, Gibbs though frantically as he tried to come up with an explanation as to why he still had the thongs left from his last ex-wife's bachelorette party. Let alone having so many.

"Um..." Tony's smirk grew even larger. "It's Abby's fault?" The last bit came out with a bit of a squeak.

Tony lost it at that point, and ended up doubled over choking with laughter. "For Christ's sake, Jeth... Even our lovely Goth wouldn't go that far! Spit it out!"

Gibbs' glare went to Defcon 4. "Okay, it's from Stephanies' bachelorette party. They thought she'd appreciate it." He resisted every urge he had to either shoot Tony, or go and hide from his current situation.

As he gasped, Tony was finally able to catch his breath. "So, did you ever wear them?"

"Hell no, DiNozzo! Do I look like a thong kind of guy? Did you fall and bump your head in the damn shower?"

"Well, maybe those headslaps are catching up to me..."

Gibbs finally gave in and smirked at the comment, shaking his head as he tried to bury his embarrassment. "Seriously, are you done now? I was figuring we'd be able to order in, then go have some dessert..." hHe said with a smirk.

"The hell with dinner! Let's go play dress-up!"

The only way Gibbs could think of shutting Tony up was with a kiss.


End file.
